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Comments: I happened to catch the "Frontline" episode last night that featured your son's story. May I say, as one father to another, how deeply sorry I am for your loss. I believe you will see Ryan again in the afterlife. Chicago, IL [View Entry] [View Entry]
Comments: Hello, I am saddened to hear about what happened to your son Ryan, I too, was a victim of bullying at school, By reading what you have said about your son, It seems he had similiar problems to what I had, I had been diagnosed with Attention Deficit Disorder, and 3 yrs later after school finished a doctor formally diagnosed me with Asperger Syndrome. Although today, Most of my "symptoms" have gone away...or at least I have learnt to mask them a lot better, I was bullied so badly that I had to walk around with teachers at lunch time, however when the teachers left....i was bullied and assaulted again. I was once assaulted by another student who threw a shoe at me, and I retaliated by ripping his shirt, I didnt mean to rip his shirt it was a sudden instinct type of thing, Anyway....I got into trouble and had to pay him money for "ripping his shirt". I too, was teased because of my learning problems and that I didnt like to be around people that much, Although I was good at English and Drama, I was terrible at Maths and I couldnt concentrate, because I didnt have any obvious signs of disability (IE Facial Features etc were like anyone elses') It made people think that I was bunging it on, These days, Im older (Maybe wiser?) and have managed to mature in some ways I think, Although I must admit that sometimes suicide seemed like the way out, I am glad that I am here, Although nothing can bring back your son and all the other children who have died in this way, If its any consolation just know that there are some good people in this world. Paul Drennan in Australia
Comments: John you are such a great person being able to go from school to school is amazing a thing i could never do i go to Northfield Middle and High School you came to this school last year. thank you so much for coming our school is totally different there is no more DRAMA and BULLIES because of you your son and family. once again thank you so much and i hope for you and your family the best of luck ¢¾ Mallory¢¾
Comments: Mr. Halligan, I am so deeply sorry for the loss of your son. I am a mother of a 15 and 12 year old daughters. I admit my children spend way too much time on the internet. I constantly go over the rules of no talking to strangers, no personal info, etc. Your story has shed new light on a different kind of internet predator that I had never even dreamed of....their own classmates and "friends". I can remember being your son's age and how cruel children can be to one another. Thank you for sharing your story and hopefully saving a life so that this doesn't happen to another child. Your family is in my prayers. God Bless You. [View Entry] [View Entry]
Comments: To Mr Halligan and Family I watched you story ON DEMAND. I just wanted to say that it really opened up my mind to all the dangers online. I just was in shock when i seen all the things the other boy wrote to your son about suicides and everything. I am a 15 year old who gets online everyday and i know everything about how it can be online. I am truley sorry for your loss and I respect how you told your story. Thank you, Mary [View Entry] [View Entry]
Comments: I saw the video on YouTube and was literally in tears. I hope nothing like this ever happens again. I am moved by that story. Thank you. I will probably be a preventer of bullying now, cyber or otherwise.
Comments: I also just watched the PBS special. As a 16 year old, it has greatly caused me to look at just how i am when it comes to interaction with the internet. Your son's story choked me up, and I truly send my condolences to your family. As a survivor of physical and verbal abuse, I have a sense, if even a little, of what it is like to go through such a thing as that. The Halligan family is going to be continually in my prayers, as well as Ryan. I am glad he is at peace now with his Heavenly Father. I hope that you may gain some of that peace as well through the great things your site does for people who are coping with the same thing. Please, if there is anything I can do, such as spreading the word, just contact me. God Bless.
Comments: To Mr. Halligan, I watched 'Growing Up Online' on OnDemand, and to tell you the truth, it has changed my life. The amazing stories and unbelievable truth has really made me look at the internet in a diffrent perspective. But the one that touched me the most was your son's story. I could not begin to imagine what you and your family have been through. I cried when I heard the story, and I will remember it for a very long time. I am 13 years old, and I am about to go into highschool. I go to an all-girls school in NJ, and one of my bestfriends is suicidal. She truly hates her life, and her situation is very bad. I do all I can to help, but i really don't know what elese there is to do. I know I am not alone, and there are many other situations like my friend's in the US today. I just really hope it works out for the better. Well, i just wanted to tell you that i really appreciated your son's story, and i hope you continue to change the lives of children like me. Thank you and I wish you the best for the future.  -Lindsey
Comments: He was so cute, such a normal looking kid, why does teasing continue to happen? it broke my heart when i saw his picture and seconds afterwards they said he commited suicide! Bullying should be a crime, there should be a punishment, this can't continue! Nobody has the right to make you feel uncomfortable and not be able to do anything about it! I feel so bad he chose that ending! I got numb when i heard that someone encouraged him to take his life, and disgusted at how cowardly the other boy's parents acted! Ryan's story touched me so much,I was also bullied, and it made me skip school, become a very closed person (which i am NOT)! It takes over your life and some people grow out of it, but others stay with it. I am a 23 year old woman now, i'm very sociable, lots of friends, but i always worry and wonder what people think about me! Being bullied also teaches you how to be more humane, more sensitive towards other people's feelings. My condolences to the family, my heart to Ryan, and my wishes to anyone who is bullied! Don't let anyone put you down, stick up for yourself! IT's ONLY school! after high school, all those people disappear and your life TRULLY begins! don't let anyone take that gift from you. A cool thing after high school is college, there, you experince such a diversity, with all types of people, all the labels that were given to you in high school, are earsed and if not, they are embraced! You DON'T want to have a network with 100 of the same people. You want diversity, mixture, different looks and opinions, so you have more probabilities! it may not make sence now... but guys, it's only mIDDLE SCHOOL/HIGH SCHOOL! life goes on afterwards. Live it, learn it, embrace it! Good luck everyone! I hope we evolve and become better people, better human beings!
Comments: That is so sad im a 12 yr old middleschooler and i know how rumors start and how they can hurt and how dearly we try to end them. i have had tough times and i do have some academical problems like how he did. and i know how it can bring you down its a shame what happened and that person who actully wanted him to do suicide. ryans touching story will always be in my heart -tyler, middleschooler. [View Entry]
Comments: I'm very sorry to hear about Ryan. My 17 year old brother committed suicide when I was 15. I know how hard it can be. I'm here if you want to talk. [View Entry]
Comments: I am truly so sorry for the pain and loss I know you feel everyday. I lost my husband to suicide. Keep sharing your story and know that you are saving lives. [View Entry]
Comments: Hello i am sorry about Ryan. It made me very sad. I sent you an email hope u can help Ninja
Comments: I just wanted to let you know how much I appreciate your story. I am a mother of two and can't imagine dealing with what you've had to deal with. My thoughts and prayers are with your family.
Comments: I was very touched by your story. I had a friend that was thinking about suicide and because of you shes doing lots better. I really am sorry about your son and i think im going to present this to my school because its such a good resource. Thanks so much and what you did was amazing. Im a tough guy and dont cry and your story was a hard one to not cry about. Thanks for everything.
Comments: i am from hong kong......i heard about the news of ur son from a tv programme,i am sorry about ur son.it made me sad after i hv watched the tv programme.i think ur son is a nice and friendly person. i think ryan will stay in peace in the heaven~~becoz he is such a lovely person.
Comments: Reading your words has not only made me cry at the loss of your child in such a horrific manner but it awakened me to begin really looking at my own boys and making sure that they are not lost in the same manner or cause such pain for another. Thank you for having the heart to share your story and allow so many in on your pain. I am sorry for your loss.
Comments: I praise you for the courage to share your story. I came accross your page while researching support for survivors of suicide. My husband died by suicide on April 23, 2008. I am saddened by the loss of your boy and applaud your efforts against the bullying. Best wishes, Tiffany Leek - Speedway, IN
Comments: Thank you for sharing your story. I came upon your website while searching for ways to make sence of my little cousins tragic suicide. I wish you and your family all the best in keeping his memory alive.
Comments: I am so sorry for your loss. I am so glad that you shared your story nationwide, I am a third-year college student and I watched the whole documentary in my women studies class. It must have been really hard for you to find all those emails. It is very sad that kids are like that in middle/high school and I was shocked how the other kids' parents didn't even reply back, just shows how many people are apathetic in this world; it isn't a good thing. Again, thanks for sharing this. May Ryan rest in peace.
Comments: My heart goes out to you. It is magnficent you are sharing your tragic experience so you can can prevent further tragedies. Perhaps guidance counselors, school principles and related professionals should teach children the dangers of bullying. Unclear your religious preferences. I believe Ryan is in heaven with the Lord and not suffering, at peace.
Comments: You and your family are awe inspiring. I can't even begin to imagine the pain of losing a child. And then to turn that around into a teachable moment for others to learn from is absolutely amazing. Sharing Ryan's story has undoubtedly saved lives and caused those who bully to reconsider why they do what they do. As someone who was bullied throughout school, I know a little about how Ryan felt. I, too, contimplated suicide on many occassions, but thankfully, never followed through. It's rough out there when you feel you are alone and are ashamed to seek out help. I only hope that with stories such as Ryan's, it will reach the impressionable youth and they'll realize that there are options available to them. Thank you for allowing Ryan's life, albeit way too short, to be an inspiration for others.
Comments: I, too, watched the rebroadcast of the Frontline program. A close friend once told me that we are only here in this world to make life better for one another. I truly believe you are accomplishing this every single day to countless people through all of your efforts. Bless you for all the good you are doing in this world. Thank you.
Comments: I watched the rebroadcast of the Frontline interview. When I saw your face, before your ever said anything I knew your son had died. I also lost my son to suicide. He was 23. I applaude your courage in sharing Ryan's story with us. I have 3 teenagers and 1 tween and I see the pain all of the time these kids inflict on one another. I remember as a child my parent's saying that kids could be mean, especially to one another, but it seems these days that they are a lot meaner. And it never ends. I liked the analogy of giving a 13 year old the keys to a car. I stayed away from the net for a long time but there is no way around it now. My computer sits in the dining area of my house and I watch what my kids are doing when they are online. It is a mine field out there and they don't have body armor. The old saying "stick and stones may hurt my bones but words will never hurt me" is one of the biggest lies of childhood. Bruises heal but the pain of someone else's words reverberate througout a person's life. They leave indelible marks on the soul. God bless you for what you are doing to help prevent this tragedy from impacting others lives. Ryan is in God's hands and no one can hurt him anymore. Prayers, Melissa K. Votano, Douglas Boyer's Mom [View Entry]
Comments: I am SO sorry for your loss. I can't imagine the pain of losing a child. I think what you are doing by going to schools and talking with other kids is a wonderful thing. God bless you and your family. Ryan will always be alive in your hearts.
Comments: It is sad that some child had to be so cruel like that. Whether your son was gay, bi, or straight, no one should have the right to bully another based on their sexual orientation. Sadly we will never see how he would grow up, yet his spirit will be with you always and never leave you. I work with GLBT youth and see the bullying and harassment from others on a daily basis. It is through talking and education that we will one day stamp out the hate that dwells within our culture. Blessed be Michael [View Entry]
Comments: John, I only wish to applaude you for your corage in sharing your story. Thanks for loving MY KIDS enough to try and help protect them.
Comments: Dear John and Family........Thank you for sharing Ryan's story. I saw you on Frontline last night. In Idaho. Ryan is absolutely beautiful. He looks so alive in his photos. You will live with a broken heart for the rest of your life. Your son watches his family suffer from above and he watches you save the lives of other sons and daughters. There are no words that anyone can say to take your pain away. But the words that you speak for Ryan are very powerful. I will never stop thinking of Ryan and your family........ My son was 17 when he crossed over in 2002 . And it still feels like yesterday. When he started the 7th grade he hated it so much. So we started home schooling for him but that didn't stop the girls who tricked him and gained his trust only to crush his heart. He even turned to God for help but his depression still took him to the spirit world. Sincerely, Martha
Comments: I am so sorry for the tragic loss of your son. Unfortunately, I don't believe "everything happens for a reason"; I do, however, believe that good things can result from horrible, unthinkable tragedies. Because of you, many, many people will be spared the suffering that your dear son experienced. Sadly, when I volunteered at a psychiatric hospital in college I found that many of the so-called 'crazy' people were some of the most sensitive, caring people in the world. I was saddened by the fact that because they seemingly never "hardened" to the many cruelties of life, their inability to merely 'get over it' was ultimately their downfall, at least in the eyes of our society. Thank you so much for sharing your story. Your Ryan was a beautiful boy.
Comments: Mr and Mrs Halligan, I just watched the story of Ryan on TV and wanted to convey my sympathy and understanding. My Son, too died of suicide, although he was a grown man. But I wanted you to know that he, too, was bullied unmercifully as a child until one year when we moved and he grew an astounding 6" during that summer. Going to a new school and going in at nearly 6 ft tall, he didnt suffer the same excrutiating taunts and bullying, but I KNOW the pain stayed with him all his life in the form of being a loner and withdrawn. How and why the bullying started is only incidental to the fact that he was also BiPolar. My Son also visited web sites concerning how to accomplish suicide and was pushed and taunted to "Go through with it". With all the good that computers are capable of, I find it shameful and disgusting that there are people out there who have no reverence for Life at all! Suicide is truly an epidemic! 30,000 PLUS people die of suicide each year here in the US! If you have not joined any kind of support group for parents of suicide, I would like to invite you to join the one I belong to and you can email me to find out which one it is. I know it was very hard for you to share Ryan's story but I thank you for doing so. People whose lives havent been touched by this tragedy have NO IDEA how it changes our lives and leaves us in pain for the rest of our lives. Somehow we HAVE to reach these kids!!! Respectfully, JL
Comments: Like so many of the recent posts, I too saw your story on frontline. Being 3 years older than Ryan I look back on my teenage years and wonder why we did so many hurtful things over the internet. After reading 'Ryan's Story' I wish I could take so many things back.... God has a special plan for everyone and even in this tragic story I feel as if the loss of a very special courageous young man has saved the lives of so many others. I am so sorry for your loss but I thank you Halligan family for sharing your son for 13 wonderful years.
Comments: watching your you tube video also makes me think of the many times i was a bystander. realizing it hurts no matter what age, i will now be more aware to step back during those times of peer pressure and think about the actions...even at the old age of 28
Comments: i was just watching your story on frontline and am brought back to 4 years ago when i was 24. i also was cyber bullied by a girl on myspace, my cell phone, and my e-mail. i've never been bullied before. i have lived, for the most part, as the happy lively mingler that is liked by everyone. i thought that was the reason why it affected me so much. i tried to ignore it b/c i felt i should. after all i was older and wiser. but it was hard not to. i would hear from her almost daily for three months with condescending and malicious words. i was told it shouldn't matter b/c it was just some psycho girl's words, but hearing your story really brought me back to the daily pain and inferiority i felt because of her. her words still stay with me. i can never share with those close to me how much i still keep it with me. to others it's ridiculous since i'm an adult and not a 12 year old girl. hearing your son's story, however, makes me realize my feelings aren't abnormal (no matter what age) and helps me to understand what i went through. thank you so much for sharing your story and the work you are doing to spread the message out to make others aware.
Comments: I am really sad about hearing this, I just saw this air on T.V., in california on KCET-HD. I am really sorry about this tradgic loss, and hope children all across the world to take better care of themseleves and not allow other peoples actions/words get to them. I know this boy, Ryan Patrick Halligan, was most likely an outstanding student, and its really sad to hear about this. I really can't get over this. I, myself, am 17 and to me this is extremely sad. I am sitting on chair right now crying about this. I hope his family has worked this out and his father is pulling through on this. Sincerly, Ari Baban
Comments: I am just finishing my first year teaching 7th grade, and have seen throughout the year the bullying that occurs in junior high. I am so glad that programs are being developed to educate our youth about the dangers of the Internet and cyberbullying. After watching Frontline tonight, I am definitely going to find an article about cyberbullying to discuss with my students before the year ends. Thank you so much for sharing your story. Your family is in my thoughts and prayers.
Comments: Dearest Mom and Dad of Ryan: The world has missed out on experiencing such a tender soul. When I look into Ryan's eyes, I see the depth of his loving heart. I can only imagine what great things he would have done in the lives of those who will never have the chance to know him. I pray that one day we will meet him in paradise. I've tried to raise my children (adults now) to be sensitive to other people's feelings. I must have succeeded because their friends tell me how good they are. They are not supersmart in the sense of this world's meaning of smart, but they surely are in the ways that matter to me. I cannot begin to imagine the torment that Ryan's bullies will have to endure as they grow into adulthood. I wouldn't trade places with them for all the tea in China. My hope is not in this world, but in the next, for this world offers very little of what is important to me. [View Entry]
Comments: I just saw your interview on Frontline and had to reach out to you and your family. I am so very touched by your son and your story. I am touched on many levels: as a formerly depressed teen (you are right, Mr. Halligan, life does get better) and as someone who has contemplated suicide (and found how to tie a noose online). Maybe I am also touched because my sister committed suicide in 2006. Or perhaps because I am now a psychologist who works with teens everyday surrounding these issues. I am especially touched by your honesty, your strength, and your true grasp of depression, suicide, and grief. This sentence on your website is so powerful: "But accountability and responsibility should be shared by all involved - parents, bullies, bystanders, teachers and school administrators ... basically the whole system." Absoutely. We as a society are responsible for the violence, trauma, and pain inflicted on the members of our community. We need to claim the violence and take ownership of what happens in our neighborhoods and schools. Sometimes I feel that I am alone in this philosophy as I see so much apathy in others. I am glad to see that others are willing to face the tragedy of suicide and share the burden of change. Thank you for continuing to share your pain, Ryan's pain, your advice, and your hope. Candice Holm Louisville, KY [View Entry] |
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