04/16/09 at 12:23 AM
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Name, age, cause of death & date of death of deceased child (or children) - Chad, he was 17 when he was on his way to work and driving in his car went off the side of the rd. and then over corrected, went to the other side, hit a tree, then ejected from the car (NO seat belt) the back of the lower neck hit a tree and died instantly. This was on January 2nd of 2005, his Birthday was on the 7th.
Other children and ages: I have no other Children, Chad was my One and Only!!
Married, single, partner: Been married for 23 yrs to my soul mate.
Where you live now, where your child died: We live in Munfordville, Kentucky...which we had moved there just 2 yrs before Chad passed.
Where your child is buried or other: Chad is Buried in the Bethany Manorial Cem. in Louisville, Kentucky.
Did you have a funeral, memorial, or other: Yes, A funeral that was 4 days with an open casket (chad just had a very few scratches on his face but you couldn't see them at all) the 4th day we buried him, and now me and my husband have a place right next to him all ready for us.
Did you receive counseling: I went to a Compassionate Friends meeting 2 times, then met this COM group (Circle Of Memories) which is a group where all have lost there child or children. They have been my saving grace! What has helped you cope the most: On-line support groups God, My Faith...and Of course I am on 2 antidepressants.
Did you start a foundation or tradition after the death of your son/daughter: Not a foundation but started many traditions...I try to let balloons go on every holiday. on Chad's Birthday I tell family and friends to come and cele. Chad's Bday. We meet at a RR and I bring a cake with says "Happy ?? Birthday Chad" and we have a pic of him sitting with his cake. some more but too many to name.
Advice: The only thing I can say is Keep the Faith and Trust in God....because He Will get you threw it! and MAKE yourself get up and out of the house, if it is just for a simple walk....you have to MAKE yourself do things, if you don't you will be doomed.
Faith or lack there of: I have a very strong belief in God as I am a Christian but Not active in a church right now. I have had Signs from Chad like no there...and I know they come from God himself to help me get threw for another day. If it wasn't for my faith, I truly do not know where I would be. Website of your child, or one you would like to share: http://chad-maddox.memory-of.com Thank you for taking the time and reading about the last 4 yrs and more of my life without my Angel Chad. Always here if you ever need anything, Michelle
04/07/09 at 09:53 PM
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Hi Cheri,
Memory-of.com has cleaned their system of the virus and given us the go ahead to return. The sites aren't functioning as we would like but they say the virus took so much of their attention they didn't have time to improve the sites. They keep assuring us they are working on the improvements and will continue until the sites are running better than ever.
04/07/09 at 02:02 PM
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Does anyone know if the memory-of website has been fixed yet? They have billed me for the last two months and I can't access my mom's page.
Thanks for your help 
03/20/09 at 10:11 PM
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Does anyone know what has happened to the memory-of.com websites, seems you need a password and username.
01/26/09 at 05:21 PM
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Hello all. My name is Lori and my only son Taylor died in a tragic (and preventable) drowning accident a few years ago. Taylor was 17 and a child with an old soul. He was smart, articulate, kind, humorous, athletic and most of all, my only son. *sigh*
Unfortunately, Taylor died when I was at an age where I was unable to conceive anymore children. I do regret not having more children. I have a surviving daughter who is now many states away attending college. I am blessed that she has survived this and is thriving. However, it has taken her years to become the silly little girl she was before Taylor died.
Please tell us all about your wonderful child that has passed. Also, any advice that you have to pass on to the newly bereaved parents that visit this website. I will start. I hope this thread will give other grieving parents an idea that they are not alone in their grief and that our community will support them as they travel down this journey of grief.
Just copy and paste to the next post and add your own information.
Name, age, cause of death & date of death of deceased child (or children) - Taylor, he was 17 when he hit his head and drowned while fishing. He died on July 17, 2005.
Other children and ages: Brooke, she is 18 now, she was 14 when Taylor died.
Married, single, partner: I am married and have been for 21 years. Marriage is "different" now.
Where you live now, where your child died: I now live in Pittsburgh, PA. My son died the same week we were moving from Arizona to PA!
Where your child is buried or other: We keep Taylor's ashes next to our bed. We have a memorial plaque for him at the Hanson Memorial Park in Scottsdale, Arizona.
Did you have a funeral, memorial, or other: We had a memorial with a picture of Taylor on stage because his body was under water for two days. We had a private viewing where he was placed on a table (gurney) in his favorite shorts, t-shirt and sandals. We held him, kissed him, layed down next to him and touched him. We took a few small cuts of hair and put them into a plastic bag. He was cremated and his remains are in a wooden box which we keep on the night stand next to our bed.
Did you receive counseling: I did for about two weeks, but I realized that the grief expert did not "get it" since she had no idea what I was going through. Talking to other bereaved parents has been the most beneficial.
What has helped you cope the most: Online support groups and forums. Not enough support group meetings where I live. Compassionate Friends has one meeting once a month but it is an hour away. Hospice has some, but most of those parents had been prepared for the death of their child, I felt very much the odd man out.
Did you start a foundation or tradition after the death of your son/daughter: We started a non-profit organization called The Taylor Fund. We help underprivileged children through various means. We have a golf outing that raises money each year. We try to do this on or near Taylor's death date.
Advice: All I can tell you is to give your grief respect. Don't try to be brave or strong. Understand that you are no longer the same person you were before your child died. You are now a new person and and have been fundamentally changed forever. I have found that people who have met me after my son died are easier to be around because they do not expect me to "get over it" or go back to being the "old me."
Faith or lack thereof: I was spiritual, sorta of Reform Jewish, (inactive), My husband is Christian. My children were brought up celebrating many different holidays. I am much less of a believer in G-d then I was before Taylor died. I look for signs of life after death, and feel that there is no right religion, maybe even no g-d, but an energy force that lives on. At least I hope so....
Website of your child, or one you would like to share: http://www.TaylorBurgstahler.memory-of.com
I hope this helps others realize they are not alone and that this site and others are available online to support and lift you up through these dark and lonely days.
Lori Burgstahler
Co-President
The Taylor Fund
http://www.TheTaylorFund.com
http://www.TaylorBurgstahler.memory-of.com TURN ON SPEAKERS TO HEAR MUSIC!
| Delia Allan Tomlin Mum | Email |
01/22/09 at 07:01 PM
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Dear Charity
I am so sorry for your pain and put what you want here but we have two very nice Forums in PM that you may get some comfort from and everyone is so warm in them here is the links to them in case you want to join ... you will need to register in each first
PM Grief Share Forums (link below)
http://www.websitetoolbox.com/mb/familyandfriends
PM Heart2Heart Grief Forums (link below)
http://www.websitetoolbox.com/mb/pm
01/22/09 at 10:26 AM
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It has been almost six months since we lost our son and it seems everyday that I feel lost. If it wasn't for my husband I don't know where I would be. We are again trying to get pregnant but it feels like it will never happen. I have felt that I wasn't worthy to be Austin's mother and I did not do my job to protect him. I worried that he was alone.
I have since been given a great gift. My niece Brooke saw my grandma holding Austin in her arms in church. Grandma died one year to the day before my Austin. Then I had another niece tell me that her 4 year old daughter was at the cemetery leaving a picture she colored for Austin when she began talking to his headstone. She told her that she was talking to Austin and he was looking at her from the stone. She said that he told her he was happy and had many friends to play with and that grandma was taking care of him. This is truly a comfort to know that my precious baby I waited so long for is happy, safe and with loving family.
| GERRY SULLIVAN/JEREMYS MOM | Email |
01/16/09 at 01:57 AM
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I CAN'T FIND THE SPOT FOR THE APRIL TRIP HAS IT BEEN CANCELLED? I THOUGHT IT WAS ON THERE.
12/23/08 at 01:00 PM
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Dearest Delia & Nancy,
I've only been a member for a short time but I really don't think I would have made it through these 1st holidays without this group. I've been reading about other groups who's members are rude to each other at times. Of course in our fragile states that can be so hurtful and overwhelming to anyone who happens to be the target of such cruelty. With grief does come anger but thankfully this group does not allow its member to abuse each other with misdirected anger caused from grief.
This group has given something that I can never repay back, they care and when they leave their messages on a message board here at Precious Memorials or light a candle at my daughter's memorial site I know it is from those who really feel the loss as I do. When i light a candle for others it is b/c i too love and grieve with them for their loss. Without this group I'm not so sure I could make it with all those firsts. Thank you for the people you are and caring enough.
Lorraine Mom to angel Kelli
12/18/08 at 03:54 AM
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I'd like to thank you all for the candles you've lit and the very warm messages. Though the break in my heart will never mend it is feeling up with your very precious angels. I'm finding there is room for love, a wonderful love for all our children and i hold them tight within my heart.
Blessings to all,
kelli's mom
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